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2009-08-03 12:31 |
boston legal 是ABC的重头戏The practice的附带系列,它讲述 Alan Shore 为一家律师事务所工作期间发生的故事及案件。故事集中在波士顿的一家高级律师所里,主要以民事诉讼案件为主。这些聪明的代理人必须处理法律允许他们做和该如何对抗他们不能做的。 当基本上尝试的时候,他们将会面对社会的和道德的议题。 这难解幽默感的系列究竟把我们带到怎样的故事里?
================================ 全世界的律所是不是都美女如云,才子扎堆啊~~~~~~ ================================
摘录几句搞笑台词: 美国法庭双方律师在交叉质询证人时,会有法庭人员在场打印律师和证人对话内容,即听即打,不可更改,作为庭审记录存档在案。如下为几场交叉询问内容:
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?' ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! ____________________________________________ 律师:你早上听到你丈夫说的第一句话是什么? 证人:他说‘我在哪,cathy?’ 律师:这有什么让你沮丧的吗? 证人:我的名字是susan!
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ____________________________________________ 律师:当发生碰撞的时候你在什么汽车里(gear:汽车,装备)? 证人:我穿着GUCCI套衫,锐步鞋。
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. ____________________________________________ ; 律师:你性欲旺盛吗?(active:活跃,动态) 证人:不,我一般就躺在那里。
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ___________________________________________ 律师:这种头部肌肉松弛症,它会影响你的记忆力吗? 证人:会的 律师:那么它是以什么方式影响你的记忆力的呢? 证人:我忘了 律师:你忘了?那你能给我们举个你忘记事情的例子吗?
ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo? WITNESS: We both do. ATTORNEY: Voodoo? WITNESS: We do. ATTORNEY: You do? WITNESS: Yes, voodoo. ____________________________________________ 律师:你知道你女儿是否曾经参加过巫毒邪教活动? 证人:我们都参加(voodoo和we do 的谐音) 律师:巫毒邪教? 证人:我们参加了 律师:你也参加了? 证人:对,巫毒邪教
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ____________________________________ 律师:那么,医生,是不是这样:一个人在睡眠中死去后,他知道第二天早上醒来才会发觉? 证人:你确实通过律师执业资格考试了吗?
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He's twenty, much like your IQ. _______________ ____________________________ 律师:你最年轻的儿子,20岁的那个,他多大了? 证人:20,和你的智商一样
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you shitting me? _________________________________________ 律师:你拍照的时候你在场吗? 证人:你当我SB啊?
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: getting laid ____________________________________________ 律师:那么,这个婴儿是在8月8日怀上的啦? 证人:正是 律师:当时你在干吗? 证人:打炮
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? W ITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________________________________ 律师:她有三个孩子,对吗? 证人:是的 律师:有几个是男孩? 证人:没有男孩 律师:那有女孩吗? 证人:(对法官)庭上,我认为我需要个不这样的律师,能让我换个新律师吗?
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess. __________________________________________ __ 律师:你的第一次婚姻是怎么结束的? 证人:丧偶 律师:是哪个人的去世结束了这次婚姻呢? 证人:你猜
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male. _____________________________________ 律师:你能描述一下那个人吗? 证人:他中等个头,留着胡子 律师:他是男的还是女的? 证人: 除非有什么有意思的事,我觉得是个男的。
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________ 律师:你出现在这里是因为早上接到了我给你律师的宣誓作证通知吗?(appearance:出现,外表) 证人:不,我上班就是这么打扮的
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. _________________________________________ 律师:医生,你有多少次解剖是在死人身上进行的? 证人:所有都是,活人一般都忍不了。
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral. _________________________________________ 律师:你所有的答复必须都是口头的,明白了?你念的哪一所学校? 证人:口头的
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The auto psy started around 8:30 p.m. ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished. ____________________________________________ 律师:你还记得你检查尸体的时间吗 证人:解剖是晚上八点半开始的 律师:所以邓盾先生那时候已经死了? 证人: 如果不是,那他就是我解剖完的时候死的。
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? ______________________________________ 律师:(本想问尿样合格了没?)你撒尿合格了吗? 证人:你问问题合格了吗?
And the best for last: 最后最牛的一个 ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. 律师:医生,你在解剖前,检查脉搏了吗? 证人:没有 律师:你检查血压了吗? 证人:没有 律师:你检查呼吸了吗? 证人:没有 律师:那么这就是说,当你开始进行解剖的时候,病人有可能还活着? 证人:不可能 律师:你怎么能这么肯定呢,医生? 证人:因为当时他的大脑在我操作台的罐子里装着 律师:我明白了,但不管怎样,有没有可能当时病人还活着呢? 证人:对,有可能,他本来能活下来而且当着律师呢。 |
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